Train – Hey Soul Sister

This song hasn’t just been in my head, oh no – it’s been absorbed by my soul. Whenever I open my mouth to sing, out comes “Hey soul sister…”. I hang up the phone at work and find myself singing it to myself under my breath, every time! And it’s been this way for a couple of weeks already.
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I Love You

i love you

“I love you”. Those three little words can mean so much, but are often bandied around with little or no thought to their meaning.
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China Anne McClain – Unstoppable

There are so many different songs I thought about posting this week, but most just seem to encourage over-indulgent self-pity and I really can’t do that. Not for long, anyway.
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REO Speedwagon – Take it on the Run

I came across some old CDs in a box this week while having a poke about in my spare room. As soon as I saw my old REO Speedwagon CD so many memories came flooding back and I had to sit down to take it all in properly. It’s not as if I’ve ever stopped thinking about him; more that I don’t think about all the little wonderful things about our friendship and the life we lived.

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Today

holding hands

Today has been a weird one
Full of stress and tears.
My head, it has been pounding
And I’ve felt older than my years.
I thought I’d lost a friend, you see,
And that thought tore me apart;
Although I’ve never met the man
He’s lodged inside my heart.
We became good friends on Twitter:
Sharing thoughts by Tweet
We learnt so much about each other
And planned one day, to meet.
It begun to get confusing –
We maybe crossed a line,
We both enjoyed it so much
So pretended it was fine.
The reality is we went too far
And something had to give
It seems that it had overflowed
into the life he lived.
We worked it out as good friends do
And set the boundaries
Both knowing its how it has to be
And both very pleased
That we made it through the other side,
our friendship still so strong
It’s not like we’re teenagers:
We both know right from wrong.
So now today is over
And peace, at last, is mine,
I’m grateful that I haven’t lost
My friend, a man so fine.

Drunken Text

drunk text

The evenings getting late and I’m sitting here alone,
Trying to keep busy but keep looking at my phone.
I sent a text while drunk last night and it’s playing on my mind,
It was a message to an amazing friend and they are hard to find.
My text said he was on my mind and I wished that he was here,
But I’ve heard nothing from him all day and I’m really starting to fear
That he’s offended or disgusted by what I had to say,
And now he’s trying desperately to quietly back away.
I know, he could be busy or just not had time to reply,
But he also could be angry and think my friendship was a lie,
And think all I ever wanted was him and me as one,
When really I just wanted a friend, something light and fun.
It’s true, feelings have developed that I don’t know how to hide,
Plus hiding would be dishonest and I try to never lie.
But don’t let it come between us, as our friendship is so great
If I can’t have you as anything else I still want you as my mate.
I trust you with everything, you know me inside out
And you never take the piss out of any of the crap I spout
Instead, you support me, give me confidence and praise
I hope you’re in my life somehow, for the rest of my days.
I worry that I can’t give you all that you give me
I hate feeling it’s all one way – I worry I’m too needy
But here, I make a promise. A vow forever true
If ever you need anything, I will be there for you.
x

I used to wonder….

I used to wonder – do you miss me?
The way we talked all night long
The way our bodies came together as one
Almost as though we were meant to be.

I look around the room and see mementos of our past
The statue from Greece. The print from Prague.
The dents in my heart where you tried to break it.
It’s stronger than you thought – it beats so proud.

The things we collected are purely things –
No special memories or sentimental worth.
My life is my own, and I’m using it wisely,
and as I sit here I know – I don’t miss you.

29th May 2012