The Return

I can’t sleep. I woke with a migraine today, which resulted in me sleeping on an off (but mostly on) for about 6 ½ hours during the day. So now, having been in bed for an hour with no sign of sleep, and a million thoughts running through my head, I find myself returning to my blog. Continue reading

Coping with Depression & Anxiety – Tip 1

This is by no means going to be a comprehensive series of tips. Depending on how I feel, I may post daily, or not for another 6 months. What I’m saying is, don’t rely on me. I’m just going to share a few things when I can, that have helped me cope a little over the years. If it helps anyone else, then I’m very happy. But no amount of little tips from me are an alternative to seeking medical help.

Look after yourselves.

Continue reading

Thoughts behind the silence

I’ve been really quiet and I apologise for that. One reason is my change in jobs: I don’t have that hour long bus journey twice a day to sleep/contemplate/observe the world around me.

Another reason is that I received a direct message on Twitter that made me think. Continue reading

My Notebook

I’ve done it. I’ve bought a nice new notebook to write notes and first drafts for this blog. I’ve been using my iPod’s notebook app, which is great, but fiddly – and it’s only when I email it to myself and paste it to Word that I see all of the auto-correct mistakes. Better and quicker to just write things down as they come into my head. So I figured when I’m out and about, on the bus, on planes – wherever – a notebook would be handy to keep track of my ideas and thoughts.

But it comes with its own set of problems. It’s brand new. A blank canvas waiting for me to  put my mark on it. But the pressure that it brings is astronomical; what if my first recorded idea is a bad one? What if as soon as I write it, I see it in its pathetic glory? Then I will have it mocking me from the front page every time I go to write in it.

It would be unreasonable of me to want all of my ideas to be good ones. To want every glimmer of a plan to evolve into a new blog post. But I’d like the first page to, at the very lease, not be cringe-worthy for ever more. Having the negativity of something glaringly bad hanging over me would, I’m sure, not help my ability to write anything even slightly resembling coherent sentences.

I refuse to wait until I have a definite ‘good’ idea though. I will not give it that much power over me. The next  idea I have will be jotted down on the first page. Adversity is all around, but it will not be found coming from my notebook.