I’m working again!! I’ve been working for two weeks now and I’m bloody loving it! It’s honestly such a relief to be earning money again; to feel like I’m paying my way, and that I can provide properly for my daughter again.
I’ve always fancied making sock monkeys. One of my good friends has one as an office mascot (and can be seen here – just scroll down to the bottom of the page), and ever since I saw him (He’s called Alan) I’ve been dying to make my own. So, a couple of weeks ago my daughter and I spent the day doing just that!
This is one of those songs that has stayed with me for years. It’s like a hug in song form. It gives me goosebumps whenever I hear it and I can’t help but sing along whenever I hear it.
I came across some old CDs in a box this week while having a poke about in my spare room. As soon as I saw my old REO Speedwagon CD so many memories came flooding back and I had to sit down to take it all in properly. It’s not as if I’ve ever stopped thinking about him; more that I don’t think about all the little wonderful things about our friendship and the life we lived.
Part of that is that we’re both so similar. We’re both a bit stubborn, both like being right and both like to have the last word.
But every now and then I look at her and I’m struck by how amazing she is. She’s only 13, yet she knows exactly who she is and what she likes. She has her own inimitable style and 100% conviction of her fashion choices. When I was 13 I was forever asking “Do I look ok?”. Not her. She knows she looks fantastic; not in a big-headed way, she just has this inner confidence that I never had. It was many years later that I finally developed that.
She’s her own person; makes her own choices. She doesn’t follow the crowd; instead she finds her own way. Her closest friends don’t like the music she likes, but instead of getting annoyed, or diluting her music taste to suit theirs she simply laughs about how they can’t open their minds even a little bit to try something new.
Yes, she can sometimes be a bit mouthy, but even then I’m impressed with how quick her mind is. She has a fantastic sense of humour and always knows how to use that humour to get out of trouble.
I’m so lucky to have a daughter like her.
I used to wonder – do you miss me?
The way we talked all night long
The way our bodies came together as one
Almost as though we were meant to be.
I look around the room and see mementos of our past
The statue from Greece. The print from Prague.
The dents in my heart where you tried to break it.
It’s stronger than you thought – it beats so proud.
The things we collected are purely things –
No special memories or sentimental worth.
My life is my own, and I’m using it wisely,
and as I sit here I know – I don’t miss you.
29th May 2012