I’ve suddenly found myself with a lot more time on my hands than I’m used to. This isn’t by any means a bad thing; it is apparent that I’ve been neglecting myself for some time so I will use this time as wisely as I can.
Inspiration comes from a multitude of places. Some are obvious; an old memory, a song, something I’ve seen from the bus. Other times it’s conversations I’ve overheard. Other people’s lives that I’ve overlapped with mine for a few moments.
One very close friend inspires me a lot. He has this knack of asking questions that really make me think. They bounce around in my head for a couple of days until I have to get the words out. He’s been responsible for a couple of my favourite posts.
Other little things stick in my mind and are stored until my brain decides it’s time to let them out. Silly incidental things, like the lovely lady who is often on my bus after work. She’s probably in her early 50s and looks so kind and caring. Her gentleman friend meets her off the bus every evening with a gentle kiss, then he takes her bags and walks her home.
I think about them quite a lot, but my thoughts aren’t quite forming words yet.
The lad that gets on my bus in the morning, who flashes his monthly bus pass like a Federal Agent flashes his badge.
The Big Issue guy not far from work, who always tells me to take care of myself.
Little things like this give me so much inspiration. People surprise me and give me hope
It makes you wonder though, as you go about your day: whose lives are you inspiring? Who is turning what feels like a run-of-the-mill occurrence into art? A painting? A poem? Or even a lowly little blog post.
If I could find a way to get all the thoughts spinning around my head out onto my laptop, I would be such a prolific writer. So many ideas, so many moments of wonder, and so many minuscule bubbles of inspiration.
I would easily have enough posts to see me through the next six months or so. But in my head they remain, just out of my reach. Is that the difference between me and a full time writer? Do I just lack the discipline (and time) to reach in further and grab the thoughts out of my head and gently coax them into words?
I really will have to work harder on it as it’s such a satisfying feeling pressing the ‘Publish’ button.
Sometimes it takes somebody else to solidify my thoughts. I could be talking to someone and they’ll tell me something, or ask me something, and my brain will latch on to it and bring it to life. Before I know it, words just tumble out of me desperate to take their rightful place on my screen.
That’s a pretty apt description. They do tumble. Somewhere between my head and my fingers they form into mostly coherent sentences. Ideas take shape. Thoughts become actions. A blog post is born.
I’ve done it. I’ve bought a nice new notebook to write notes and first drafts for this blog. I’ve been using my iPod’s notebook app, which is great, but fiddly – and it’s only when I email it to myself and paste it to Word that I see all of the auto-correct mistakes. Better and quicker to just write things down as they come into my head. So I figured when I’m out and about, on the bus, on planes – wherever – a notebook would be handy to keep track of my ideas and thoughts.
But it comes with its own set of problems. It’s brand new. A blank canvas waiting for me to put my mark on it. But the pressure that it brings is astronomical; what if my first recorded idea is a bad one? What if as soon as I write it, I see it in its pathetic glory? Then I will have it mocking me from the front page every time I go to write in it.
It would be unreasonable of me to want all of my ideas to be good ones. To want every glimmer of a plan to evolve into a new blog post. But I’d like the first page to, at the very lease, not be cringe-worthy for ever more. Having the negativity of something glaringly bad hanging over me would, I’m sure, not help my ability to write anything even slightly resembling coherent sentences.
I refuse to wait until I have a definite ‘good’ idea though. I will not give it that much power over me. The next idea I have will be jotted down on the first page. Adversity is all around, but it will not be found coming from my notebook.